The Addictive Quality of Being Right

Hi, I am Danie. And I’m addicted to being right.

I know what it feels like, when I am righteously right: There is this feeling of glee deep in me. It feels so darn good, and I want more of it.

It is Gollum cackling with joy, because he owns his Precious again.

It is addictive, this feeling.

Nothing that comes out of glee is good. Every time I’ve felt that feeling, something got deleted or eroded in the bigger context.

I am learning that that feeling is a signal that I am off-track. That I am playing the game of status, where I have to be above another. Where I have turned all my attention to myself and what victory I require.

And I sit with it, and I let it pass without giving it energy.

Because willing it to go away, would be willing this feeling to be wrong.
And that would be willing myself to be right.
And that would be another addictive hit.