A thought I read in a baby book a decade ago: Blow-ups, conflicts, and moments of anger are inevitable. Ruptures happen.
In a healthy relationship, the repair also happens. Later, when all has calmed down. The repair is an act of vulnerability and done delicately.
This though: When the rupture happens in front of a witness, then that is all they witness. They rarely see the repair.
To the witness, their experience is one rupture after another.
Close the loop on conflict: Whoever was present at the rupture need to witness the repair.
It is the safest way.